Just My Thoughts

Happy LOVE day!

2009-02-13T10:48:00.000-08:00

Well, tomorrow's the DAY OF LOVE -- translation -- my baby is getting older, and fast!
Sydney's birthday was the 11th and we are having her party tomorrow. I can't believe, 2 already!
I found her sitting in the middle of the dining room table last night, eating Nerds. I had left the box on the table, not thinking anything of my little candy monster getting them. Next thing I hear is "something" hitting the floor -- like 30 or so Nerds. When I rounded the corner, imagine my surprise to find her sitting in the middle of the pub high table. It was so funny! Yes, there are pictures. To be posted later.
Hope your day is full of love!!
xxoo

My Year in Review

2009-02-10T08:38:00.000-08:00

Ok, since I didn't blog in a timely manner, why not just do a quick review and start fresh? Yes, it's February, 2009 and I still don't blog very good-maybe today is the day when all that changes!

I'll go back as far as September - 19th ankle surgery had me in a cast for 7 weeks (Nov. 4th). During that time I participated in the 3 day walk for breast cancer. Ok, not much of a walker with a cast on, so I was in a wheelchair. I do want to blog the walk seperate, as the feelings and emotions go very deep.

Nov. 4th we voted Barak Obama into office as our 44th (?) president. First president to be anything other than white. I think it's cool because he's so young. He has a young wife and young kids. That's not common. Maybe the "cool, young" Obama will bring some changes to this country. Time will tell.

Nov. 6th another surgery. Not so bad this time, I guess. I had more reconstruction to do from the breast cancer/mastectomy. This was "just" implant replacements. No pain. In and out of the hospital same day. Still kicked my butt and put me in bed for a few days.

Dec. was a fun month. Christmas proved to be very exciting. Bill's family came in from Atlanta, so I had the entire Gecewicz clan at the house (minus one aunt from NY) It was warm and the kids played in the pool. Unless it's 30 below, Savannah thinks the pool is plenty warm to swim.

January -- finally ! 2008 is over and 2009 begins. Not much exciting going on, except I'm still in therapy for my ankle. When will this fun time of my life ever end? I did go to Texas on the 26th for a week. 3 days were for work in Austin then 4 days in Dallas for fun. And, let me tell you, it was fun !!! Whenever we get together with Bill's friends, FUN is a must ! I didn't sleep for about 4 days - no more than 3 to 4 hours each night. When you see each other once a year, what do you expect? Can't wait for next year!

February, ahhhh, Bill's birthday weekend (6th-8th) proved to be fun. We were at the beach, with more family and another set of friends. It was a blast. Even though I spent Friday night and part of Saturday in the room, sleeping and reading. OH! Reading !!!! Twilight !!!! New Moon !!! Now Eclipse!!!! I can't stop reading. I've never read a book before in my life, not even when I was in school and it was required. (I just used cliff notes) But, now I can't stop!
Ok, back to Bill. His birthday comes to an end tonight. Tomorrow is Sydney's 2nd birthday and it's all about her. He had his weekend at the beach, movies last night, steak dinner tonight. That's enough, right ?

Now, let's see how I do with blogging on a regular basis, shall we ??? ta-ta for now

Latest "I can't believe it"

2008-09-22T08:32:00.000-07:00

Wow, tomorrow will be 4 months since surgery. Funny as that sounds, today is 3 days since my most recent surgery. For someone who has been incredibly healthy and has never had surgery, 2008 is definitley the year for me and the OR.
Friday, the 19th, I had my ankle operated on. I fell in February and tore 4 ligaments in my right ankle. Things got put on the back burner when the breast cancer was found. The doctor is very pleased with what he was able to do. He feels that the surgery was a success. The only problem is the pain in my ankle!! OH MY!!!!! And, I have a cast on from my toes to my knee on my right leg. Life is at a stand still right now.
Oh well, life goes on. Will post when/if anything exciting happens. I'll even post a picture of this incredibly large thing on my leg.
Until later,
ta ta

July Update

2008-07-15T15:58:00.000-07:00

I am not very good at blogging everyday. You'd think as much as I love to talk, I would to speak my mind every day, right ?
Anyway, the month started out great. We spent 4th of July at Hudson Beach. Deb and her kids went. Mom and Dad met us out there and spent Saturday on the beach and eating oysters. It was a well needed weekend away from home.
Yesterday, the 14th, I saw the plastic surgeon for the last expansion. We tentatively set my next surgery for November 7th. Now I just sit and wait, and heal. She is very pleased with the way things have turned out and so am I ! It's going to be weird not going to the doctor every week. Now I can actually work a normal schedule.
Tomorrow, I start walking with Maribel. She is very disciplined when it comes to walking and running, so she will motivate me. The 60 mile walk is October 31st and I wonder if I can walk even one mile right now. So, we are going to attempt 3 tomorrow and see how it goes. And, we have scheduled 3 days a week, for now. I've come this far, I have to do this !!
Ok, well, signing off for now. Going to catch up with Pastor Randall's adventures. It's become something I look forward to each day.

Month of June

2008-06-28T20:06:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I'm not so good at updating my blog. This month has been challenging to say the least. The month started out with me mostly flat on my back. I started my tissue expansion on June 9th. Very different experience. Until you've seen this first hand, you really don't get it. The plastic surgeon takes a magnet, sticks it to my (what would be) boob, finds the "port" and sticks a needle in me, that fast. Then, she takes a syringe filled with 60 cc's of fluid and with all her might, fills me up. She puts two syringes in each boob (which is now a boob, cause it's growing before my eyes!) So, the first week, I was really sore. Monday night, Tuesday, Wednesday and feeling much better on Thursday.
Week two, better, because I knew what to expect. I will go thru this process every Monday for a total of 6 weeks. So, my last "fill up" will be July 14th. Then I sit for three months. This is the time when the body heals.
I am assuming my permanent implants will go in sometime in November. (Because these things I have now are not permanent, mearly on loan)
Ok, back to how the month has gone .... I decided that I would go back to work on the 16th of June. What was I thinking ?? Sitting at the computer is just not as fun has it used to be. It's hard to sit and do work after being lazy (ok, resting) for so long. But, now it's the end of the month and I think I'm bouncing back just fine.
I still get tired easily and I can't stay active two days in a row. But I will get there. I'm glad that I was able to start driving again, that sure makes life easier! I was going crazy not being able to just go anytime I wanted to.
If nothing else, I am certainly not taking the little things in life for granted and I am so grateful for what I am able to do and for the family and friends that I have. I never knew so many people liked me :-)
And I love them all !!!!!!!!!

Thursday 5/29

2008-05-30T19:18:00.000-07:00

Today is Savannah's 10th birthday !! I can't believe it ! She made cupcakes with Grandma K. last night so she took them all to school today. This would be the first year she was still in school for her birthday. Usually school lets out right before her birthday. So this was exciting for her.
Bill took her to Beef's tonight for dinner. Also, Abbie, Sandy, Cindy, Noah, Cindy, Alexa, Alyssa, Madisyn, Thomas, Bobby and Micheal went. She was surprised. Sandy got her a Hannah Montana cake. She got money to help out with her Girl Scout camp this summer and some stuffed animals.
After dinner, every body stopped by the house to say hi ! Me and moma were home with Sydney, and the house was quiet - oh well !
Another day of healing for me. Still sore but still cancer free !!
Sydney is another story -- this kid is so funny. Her thing right now is giving "lips". She puckers up those big chunky lips and comes running toward you for a kiss. She is good to entertain herself. She has started using Tessa as her own personal bench. She will walk over to Tessa and just sit down. Tessa lays there and takes it. Sydney follows her big sis around and wants to be with her all the time. Sometimes it drives Savannah crazy, but all in all, she loves it.

Ok, back to me. I saw both the Dr. Hechtmans today. Dr. Jill was very happy with my incision, I show minor swelling and she confirmed that Doug was benign. Dr. Jason read the pathology reports to me, and I was surprised! There were masses as big as 4 cm. found in the breast tissue that he removed. I asked him how long he thought I had cancer and he said "a while."
Studies show that being on the pill, being pregnant and breast feeding are all things that reduce your risk for breast cancer. In my heart, I think Sydney saved my life, or at least prolonged it.
Think about it -- if I had cancer "a while" -- I wasn't due for a mammogram until I turned 35 years old. I got pregnant with her right before I turned 34. And, I breast fed. So, just maybe, by being pregnant and by breastfeeding, the rate at which the cancer reproduced was slowed down. There is no way at 33 or 34 years old I would have gotten a mammogram, so something had to slow it down until it was time for my cancer to be found, right ? We will never really know when it began or the answer to that question, but that is what I am going to believe.

Wednesday 5/28

2008-05-30T19:16:00.000-07:00

Just another uneventful day. Laying around, realizing there is absolutely nothing on TV during the day, that is exciting. However, you can watch CSI or Law and Order anytime of the day or night, if you want to.
It was nice to relax.

Post op #1

2008-05-30T19:11:00.000-07:00

Tuesday, May 27th
I went to see Dr. Coberly today. She was very impressed with my lack of brusing. Still some swelling, but that is to be expected. She removed two tubes. I can't wait to get the others out. What a great feeling to be free of those things. I know they are important, but so uncomfortable.
That pretty much wore me out. I feel like I've run a marathon and all I really did was get up, get dressed and ride in the car.
We came straight back home and I returned to my comfy spot. I am actually more comfortable on the couch/recliner than I am anywhere else.
Bill and Sydney took Pat home this afternoon. Steph came by and brought me some things to make my bed bound life easier.
Another good day. Status quo I guess.

1st day home

2008-05-30T19:07:00.000-07:00

Monday, May 26th
I finally made it home !! I have never been so happy to be in my own bed before. Although, this would be the beginning of a very long adventure. I have 4 tubes, 2 on each side, for drainage. I have two incisions on my chest, one under my left arm and one in the bikini area.
My abdomen is sore, my stomach hurts, my sides are sore, my upper chest muscles hurt. I can't lift my arms and standing up is a real challenge.
The plan today, take my pain meds, lay in bed and watch TV or sleep.
Sydney was excited to see me. I let her on the bed with me until she hit my left chest incision, then we decided she probably shouldn't be on the bed with me yet.
Over all, the day went well. I don't think I complained too much. My mommy took very good care of me! Pat is still here, I wanted her to stay and be with me my first day home. Savannah came home in the evening. Deborah and the kids came over to see me.

Surgery and Hospital

2008-05-30T18:51:00.000-07:00

May 23rd -- 6:00 am St Joseph's Women's Hospital.
I was actually calmer than I thought I would be. I got called back pretty quick, so I didn't have a lot of time to sit around and think about what was about to happen. I changed my clothes, got put on a stretcher, covered in really warm blankets, with TED hose and ugly green skidders on my feet and the ever so loved hospital gown. My IV was started and my EKG leads were placed. Finally, Bill and Moma could come back and see me. Pastor Randall came in. He said a prayer and I was at peace. The room was cleared and in came Sandy, my anesthesiologist. She was an older lady, reminded me of a young grandmother. She was very nice and I knew I was in good hands. She put something in my IV, then gave me a mask to breathe thru. Two breaths and I was out!
I woke up about 2:00 in the recovery room. Apparently surgery went a little longer than the doctors originally expected. I later found out that I had a large amount of tissue to be removed. And that Dr. Coberly is very detailed, for which I am grateful!
My vitals were not stable. My blood pressure was too low and my heart rate was too high. Not surprising, look what just happened to me. A double mastectomy, placement of tissue expanders and a ovary/tube removal with tubal ligation. I had so many doctors that the staff didn't even know who was in charged :-)
I finally stablized about 5:30 and was sent to the 4th floor, room 420. Karen was my recovery nurse and called me her "hero patient of the day". Not sure if it was the drugs, or what, but I felt really good, not nearly as much pain as I expected at that point.
I had a good night Friday, slept rather well. Bill stayed with me at the hospital that night. I know he slept becuase everytime I moved, he was snoring.
Saturday, I woke up early. Dr. Hechtman and Dr. Coberly visited, both very happy with my outcome and even said if I felt up to it, I could go home that day. That wouldn't happen. Jamie and Ben Chase came up to visit me. They said a prayer for me. And then I began reacting to the Morphine pump. Only I didn't know the cause at the time. I was sick for hours ! I couldn't keep anything down. Since my catheter had come out, I was forced to get out of bed and everytime I did, I threw up. As long as I was sleeping, I was fine, but my mom said as soon as I woke up she grabbed the bucket and Abbie grabbed a wet/cold rag. I was miserable. Cindy Nestle came up later in the day and immediately said I was dehydrated. She requested the nurse push a bag of fluids, we asked that the morphine be stopped and/or changed. And it was. I refused pain meds for about 9 hours, so I could clear my head. Finally about 2:00 am, I felt somewhat normal. I ate two crackers and drank some water. I stayed in, I knew I was on the right track. Thank GOD for Abbie and Cindy that day ! They were truely my angels.
I woke up Sunday feeling like a new person. Every few hours I would "lose" something, making me more independent on me and less on tubes and machines. Cindy gave me a bed bath and washed my hair. That was the first time I'd ever had a bed bath. She was so good to me. Then, Moma and Bill came up to visit. I progressed from there with my diet, began eating more and more and wanting more and more :-)
One positive thing I remember about Saturday was Sir Fox. He was the cutest little Shelty who came to visit me from the Pet Therapy dept. of the hospital. He even said a little prayer for me, too!
Monday I was finally released and got home about 2:30 in the afternoon.

February thru May, 2008

2008-05-30T18:28:00.000-07:00

I kept a paper journal for both of my girls until early February. Since then alot has happened, when I need to journal the most. I need to get these last few months caught up. While this won't be the most detailed journal, it will help me to get my thoughts down on "paper".

Lets go back to February, when life as I knew it took a turn in another direction.

Feb. 5th, we came home from Las Vegas. We were there with Bill's friends for SuperBowl. Our trip was Jan. 31st thru the 5th of Feb. Mom and Dad came home a day early, as they brought Sydney back with them. Due to school, Savannah stayed home with Sandy. She had a great time and was on her best behavior. She knows she has to be when she is with Sandy.

Feb. 8th was Bill's 43rd birthday. Abbie came over to babysit Sydney for us. Stephanie and Brad met us out for dinner at Fuego and then we decided to go to O'Briens for drinks. I didn't care. I was DD, it was Bill's night and I know how he and Brad like to have fun and let loose when they are out together. We got to OB's and I tripped in the parking lot on the way in. I heard a very loud pop in my right ankle and knew I had done some damage. I have never broken or sprained anything, so I was in for quite an experience. They iced my ankle and like a trooper, I sat at the table while my husband continued to enjoy his birthday. It wasn't until the next day when I realized I could not walk, that I knew something serious was wrong. I went to a scrapbook crop in Tampa with Nancy that day, knowing I shouldn't drive. That afternoon, I went to the Emergency clinic and got xrays, my ankle was not broken. They wrapped me and sent me on my way with my crutches. After 5 days, the swelling in my ankle had not gone down and I was still very brused, I went for an MRI. On Feb. 18th, I finally got an appointment and went. While I was there, I saw that Mammograms were done there, so I decided while I was waiting to have the boobies squished. I knew that would make my mom happy and I was due anyway. It came back that I tore 4 ligaments in my ankle, 1 completely and the others just really bad. Either way, it hurt ! I was in a black boot for 9 weeks, then started physical therapy.

Now back to the mammogram - it came back not good. I went on March 18th for a diagnostic mammogram of the left breast. 4 hours later my phone rang, it was Jai at Tampa Obst. She made me an appointment with Dr. Jason Hechtman, the breast specialist next door. That would be Thursday at 1:45. Deborah and Stephanie went with me. But I already knew what he would tell me. I had picked up my reports from the diagnostic center and I have medical background, so when I read "malignancy" I knew. And, why not ? So, I saw Dr. Hechtman, and immediately felt comfortable with him. I went for a biopsy on April 2nd. I had a PET scan done. The biopsy came back, as expected. DCIS in the left breast. And the PET revealed that my lymph nodes were negative for cancer. What a relief -- however, the PET scan also revealed a tumor in my right ovary, later to be known as "Doug". After an MRI, more blood work, more testing and more emotions, doctors feel certain that Doug is benign. It was decided on a double mastectomy and hysterectomy.
I just didn't think I could handle always wondering if cancer has returned to my other breast, or in my ovary, or in my uterus....the questions you would expect, the fears you don't want to live with.
Finally, my surgery was set for May 23rd.
I went for pre-op with Dr. Hechtman (s) on Wednesday 5/14 and Dr. Jill decided we would not do the hysterectomy, she was certain she could remove the tumor only. Worst case, she would take out the ovary and tube and do a tubal ligation on the left. On 5/16 Pat went with me to the hospital pre-op. On 5/19 Bill and I did pre-op with Dr. Coberly and finally we were ready. My mom got here on Wednesday the 21st.